Good news for Ryan Reynolds fans- He's officially filed for divorce from Scarlet Slut-hansson. I'm married, so I'm not exactly in a position to take a number for this sex-on-a-stick actor, but there are plenty of better women out there for him than her. Then again, my husband did wake me up at 4:30 in the morning to share this bit of happy news with me, still trying to figure that one out.
Here's my thing about Scarlet- sure, she's pretty, and she's not a bad actress. But she clearly has a thing or two to learn about relationships. She was the one to first bring up divorce, but they agreed he'd file so she wouldn't have to be the bad guy. Umm... this is stupid. As a divorcee myself, here's a tip for those who haven't been there: there is always a "bad guy". And it's typically the person who first asks for the divorce, when the rest of the bloody-gorey details are kept private. This is clearly one of those cases. I have several friends who were the petitioner in their divorces, but I'm close enough to them to know that the reasons behind the filing were not their fault. But outsiders who don't have the privileged information as to exactly what went wrong typically don't see it that way. My divorce was one of these cases. My ex-husband was a bad person, and very few people knew it. His actions that caused me to leave him where out of character for the guy everyone else knew. I'm the bad guy in my divorce, because to everyone else, it looked like I just up and left. This was not the case. But to be frank, I don't give a shit. It's no one's business but mine and my family's. I'm used to having a less than desirable reputation, what's one more rumor to my credit? The people I care about know the truth and that's all that matters.
Ryan Reynolds has always struck me as very mature, very well-carried individual. Anything but the Van Wilder character he started out as, basically. Apparently the "real" reason behind the divorce was that they spent too much time apart. I don't buy this. Scarlet has been hanging out with her ex, Jared Leto, quite a bit throughout her marriage, and has been leaning on a lot of male celebrity buddies of hers for support through this. It's more likely that she just wasn't ready for marriage, wasn't ready to be unavailable and decided to bow out. Which is fine! I don't see why people aren't honest about their divorces, this happens allll the time. My husband's ex-wife just split with her boyfriend of 3 1/2 years and he is just now learning from us why she and my husband divorced in the first place. OK, she was a whore... I can see why people don't share that. But there is an immense amount of respect out there for people who can cop up to their mistakes and admit they made a booboo. I don't know why that's been thrown out the window. As bad as my ex is, I made my mistakes too. Plenty of them, I never claimed to be perfect.
No matter what the story is, anyone who's been divorced is a schmuck. Whether they were the guilty party or they were crazy enough to stay with a son-of-a-silly person, there's a schmuck hat for everyone. And I imagine these hats look something like berets with little springs where that wee button is, and on the top of that spring is a goofy little ball. Like those Jack in the Box heads for car antennas. Only sillier.
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