Facebook: A Love/Hate Relationship

I think we can all agree that Facebook is one of the best things since sliced bread. It's also one of the most irritating systems ever thought up. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being able to keep in touch with old friends, post pictures to share with my family, snoop on the self-absorbed, overweight ninnies I went to high school with. Hours of fun-filled entertainment! But there should be a handbook for Facebook etiquette because people just don't quite have a grasp on how to use it. I've taken the liberty of jotting down a few of my own rules:

1. Avoid "This is about YOU, but I'm not going to use your name" status updates. Big, big, BIG annoyance. You know it's about them, they know it's about them, everyone else knows it's about them. Better idea? Post it on THEIR wall, or better yet, sent them a private message. Problem solved.
2. Avoid status updates that are just notes to a specific person. Perfect example- "Happy Birthday, Love Muffin Scrumptiousdoodles!" Again, this is what walls are for. They don't have a Facebook? Then why post it to begin with?!?! They'll never read it unless YOU show them! Don't expect others to call that person and be like "Dude, Meg said 'Happy Birthday' on Facebook... FYI." It never happens.
3. I don't care if Facebook says the age limit is 13... it's 18. If you're still in high school, use MySpace. Please. No one wants your petty crap on their wall. (Then again, I'm convinced this is why the "hide" button was born.) You can't have fancy, personalized backgrounds. You can't pick music to start when your page loads. Guess what? Facebook was initially designed for young adults. Not children. I don't care if mom and dad gave you permission, come back in 5 years.
4. Punctuation, Spelling and Grammar- STILL a staple in the English language. I get SO SICK of the "OMG! BFF & BF hooked ^, IDC NEmore!!!" Umm... ENGLISH!?!?! Stop showing off your ability to create acronyms from already short phrases. It's not exactly a coveted talent.
5. Stop starting DRAMA!!! Seriously, Facebook is NOT a virtual battleground. You know what you're saying when you say it so don't act like it was an accident. You're starting crap, you know it, delete it, apologize, move on. Facebook is NOT a substitution for real, human conversation.
6. Think before you post! People need to understand that when something is written, it looses 90% of the conversational effects it would have had if you'd said it in person. Facial expression, tone and sarcasm are some of the biggest. If you post something that someone takes wrong, APOLOGIZE. These are basic principles that have been around since before the Internet. Because you know what happens if you don't say you're sorry and drop it? DRAMA!! Already started drama? Refer to rule No. 5.
7. Don't complain about other people's posts if you simply disagree. Offensive posts are one thing. But simply disagreeing? Um, no. Welcome to the human race. You aren't going to agree with everyone and they certainly aren't going to agree with you. Let it GOOO!!!! Guess what? If you don't agree, you don't have to read it! It's shouldn't be any one's personal mission to "referee" Facebook. Too much work to not get paid for.

OK so this is obviously going to be a part one post, because I could go on all day. You see where I'm going with this. Somewhere, we lost control over this awesome concept and it's practically swirling down the pooper as we speak. Am I one of the few that still remembers when Facebook was for college students only? I'm seriously wondering why they changed that. Oh right, the same reason most businesses go corrupt and start sucking royally... money.